On this Mother’s Day, as we reflect on the past year, the impacts of COVID-19 on working mothers deserve our attention.
I have heard many people equate the COVID-19 pandemic to a period of wartime: a life-altering change to our collective society.
At first, I thought it was an inaccurate comparison because I feel like the impacts of COVID-19 are so nuanced – depending on your geography, your age, whether you are a parent, your socioeconomic status, your health profile, whether you were a front-line worker, if the death toll impacted you personally, and more.
Yet of course wartime had a similarly nuanced effect on Americans.
For mothers, particularly student mothers, COVID-19 has brought about a host of new challenges, including childcare, isolation, a million decisions on risk tolerance, and increased burdens. It also made the world feel like a much larger place if you are far from family and rely on air travel.
The silver linings were in the extra time that we got to spend with our little ones – those in-between moments and mini milestones that we might not otherwise have been present for.
While the MoMBA group could not gather with the same frequency as past years, we were still a support group for one another as we navigated the joys and challenges of motherhood.
The student parent community at Harvard Business School is heavily skewed towards fathers as opposed to mothers, with a 5:1 father to mother ratio. Given the additional challenges mothers bear – namely, pregnancy and breastfeeding – this is no surprise.
That said, the student mother community at HBS is growing every year. In 2020 almost every section could have one mother in the mix, to add a unique perspective to case discussions and to act as a role model of hope for classmates wondering how they will ever balance families with ambitious careers.
This Mother’s Day, we are grateful to one another, and to all the mothers out there – biological, adopted, figurative, and symbolic – for their boundless love amidst an incredibly challenging year.
I am delighted to introduce you to a few of our inspiring student mothers through their profiles below.
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Name: Sally Sorte
Child: Olivia (1 year)
Student Status: EC
Where are you from? Oregon
Professional pathway pre-HBS: Teach for America Hawaii; Google; founded a charter school in a historically disadvantaged community in Denver; McKinsey
Little one’s favorites: Pout Pout Fish, “Wheels on the Bus,” “If you’re happy and you know it,” peekaboo, and going to the park
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? An incredible community of peers.
How do you make it work? A supportive and fully engaged spouse; knowing that a happy mama is a happy baby - so I can invest time in myself without qualms.
What advice do you have for others thinking about starting a family? There’s never a perfect time. It’s a lot of fun and very rewarding. Give yourself grace – you are going to have the highest expectations for yourself, so be kind. Live near family and/or be prepared to pay for help, you definitely need help.
What has been most challenging about being a mama during COVID? All of us trying to work from a tiny space this winter - my husband, me, our nanny, and Olivia. Also, living far away and not being able to see family. Olivia has not yet met my dad or brother, but we are excited to see them this summer!
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Children: Yasmina (2 years), Antonio (1 month)
Student Status: EC
Where are you from? New York and Maryland
Professional pathway pre-HBS: Manufacturing Manager
Post HBS plan: Management Consulting
Little one’s favorites: Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, “Baby Shark”
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? The support and community from moms and non-parents.
How do you make it work? My partner and friends are the key. My partner reduced his working time before the pandemic then after moving back to MD, my partner's family stepped up to help.
What advice do you have for others thinking about starting a family? You can do it but it takes having a support system, including a partner or family, or outsourcing.
What has been most challenging about being a mama during COVID? Being stuck inside the house. There are so many distractions and I also don't like my toddler feeling trapped inside.
What’s the best part of being a mom? Becoming a mother has helped center me, keeps me focused, and helps me prioritize. It forced me to be in touch with my emotions; something I used to actively ignore.
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Name: Alice Liu
Child: Mia (almost 3 years)
Student Status: EC
Where are you from? China and Canada
Professional pathway pre-HBS: Investment Banking
Little one’s favorites: Mia loves "Wheels on the bus", cooking with mommy, and giggles with daddy.
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? Seeing my daughter THRIVE in this community!
How do you make it work? Honestly in COVID it's been about deprioritizing and giving some things up! My husband and I are both students and Mia goes to the daycare. The childcare hours were not enough to cover what we needed professionally/in the classroom, so I took a semester off.
What advice do you have for others thinking about starting a family? This is advice from one of my favorite professors at HBS: Don't take too much credit or too much blame for parenting. I parent very intentionally, but I also don't over-worry. Humans are very adaptable, and so are children.
What has been most challenging about being a mama and student during COVID? CHILDCARE.
How to get your spouse to be supportive in a dual-professional family? In my mind, a supportive spouse is not only supportive in spirit/financially, they do the grunt work proactively. Get them involved from day one: ask them to take the full paternity leave; ask them to track a newborn's milk intake and count soiled diapers; ask them to manage childcare applications/babysitter hunting, etc. Then, PRAISE them directly, and praise them in front of your children. We all deserve praise and I think it's a healthy, positive family environment for everybody.
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Name: Adriana Cruz Martins
Child: Sophie Maria (2 weeks)
Student Status: RC
Where are you from? Brazil, Portugal
Professional pathway pre-HBS: Civil engineer in the construction industry followed by three years in infrastructure investing in France
Summer Internship: Investment Banking
Little one’s favorites: Breastmilk ;)
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? The support from classmates.
Name: Ida Hatchue
Child: Kaleel (3 months)
Student Status: EC
Where are you from? North Carolina, California
Professional pathway pre-HBS: Investment Banking
Plans post-HBS: Working on my startup full time. The company is called KARL (thekarl.co)
Little one’s favorites: milk, milk, milk
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? Meeting other amazing moms who are doing amazing things professionally and personally. I am so grateful for the MoMBA club. They were so helpful throughout my pregnancy journey and now motherhood journey!
How do you make it work? Having an amazing partner helps! Being virtual has been a plus as well. Other than that, taking it one day at a time is how I make it work. When my baby smiles at me, things get put back in perspective.
What advice do you have for others thinking about starting a family? Do it! I was definitely nervous about starting a family while in school, but everyone—professors and students—is so supportive. Now I can't imagine life without my little one here.
What has been most challenging about being a mama and student during COVID?
Not being able to socialize. We have been isolated from everyone to make sure our baby doesn't get sick. It has been hard not being able to allow family and friends to see Kaleel.
What surprised you most about being a mother? I was surprised by how powerful my baby's smiles are! I find myself saying "Kaleel you're so cute" like ten times a day. There have been times when I'm exhausted at whatever time in the morning breastfeeding and he'll give me a little smile. It makes everything worth it.
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Name: Dominique Lacassie
Child: Elisa (almost 3 years), Amalia (due May 8th)
Student Status: EC
Where are you from? Chile
Professional pathway pre-HBS: Financial Services in Chile
Post HBS Plan: BCG, Boston Office
Little one’s favorites: Dancing, Llama Llama books, all kinds of berries, riding her scooter on campus.
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? Being able to spend a lot of time with her!
How do you make it work? I put everything on my calendar and my partner is great.
What advice do you have for others thinking about starting a family? Embrace it to be able to enjoy it. Be proud of it! It’s the best!!
What has been the best part of motherhood? I appreciate all her love so much. She gives me lots of energy. Nothing better than her hugs and kisses. And now she says “I love you, too!” She makes us so happy.
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Name: Kanako Sakai
Child: Ren (4 years)
Student Status: EC
Where are you from? Tokyo, Japan
Professional pathway pre-HBS: Management consulting
Post HBS Plan: Management consulting
Little one’s favorites: Favorite book: Knuffle Bunny Too; Favorite food: chocolate (a super special treat!)
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? The best part was to meet other brilliant student moms at HBS! It was also great that I was able to think deeply about priorities in my life, already having a child.
How do you make it work? I constantly talked with my husband (who is also an HBS student) who would take care of what and when. Also, we had clear prioritization (i.e. prioritize family time) so we just made sure that we stick with that.
What has been most challenging about being a mama and student during COVID?
Having to take care of a 3-year-old son at home while attending classes and doing all exams and papers. I felt that there was no "me time".
What advice do you have for others thinking about starting a family? Don't overthink whether you are ready to start a family or not. You will constantly learn and become a mother while raising your child.
What surprised you most about becoming a mother? How both hard and rewarding it has been to raise a little human being. It definitely is not as shiny or fancy as all the Instagram posts suggest. But, his little giggling and smile just make my day and I can feel a sense of accomplishment whenever my son learns something new. It is truly an incredible experience.
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Name: Kathu Gatobu
Child: Kendi (almost 2 years)
Student Status: RC
Where are you from? Nairobi and Maryland
Professional pathway pre-HBS: Management consulting
Post HBS Plan: Management consulting
Little one’s favorites: Animal books, ABC songs, Google 3D animals, fruits and all kinds of berries, playing outside, dogs and enjoys foot massages
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? Going through the HBS experience with my daughter has been the best part of the journey. She was one year old when I started RC year. It has been fulfilling witnessing her blossom into a talkative, outgoing, confident toddler as I have in my own way transformed during my first year at HBS. She keeps me grounded in a fast-paced environment. I am clear on my priorities and optimize every minute in my day to maximize my time here while still being involved in her life. Random hugs and kisses in the middle of case prep make the ride sweeter. It sounds silly, but she's truly my little best friend and I cannot imagine not having her at HBS.
How do you make it work? It takes a village to raise a child. I have relied heavily on family to help me while I'm in business school. Family members have lived with me, adjusted schedules and traveled to give a lending hand. We are both lucky.
What advice do you have for others thinking about starting a family? In terms of timing, I believe one can try and get ready but nothing can fully prepare one for motherhood. Learning on the job is a big part of the job. Building a support network is critical for juggling a family and career. Support could take many forms such as family, friends, neighbors or daycare. It's important to have a plan A, B, and C if possible. Have a plan in place but leave room for flexibility and fun along the way.
What surprised you most about becoming a mother? Before becoming a mother, I did not appreciate how fast children grow. Watching my child's brain develop has been fascinating. With each passing week, I'm stunned at her exploding vocabulary, ability to take in the world around her, connect the dots, and recall. Last week she randomly said “chimpanzee” (what a big word!), yesterday she soaked her shirt while drinking water and we talked through the concept of wet. Today we sat on the balcony and watched the rain and she said wet! These little moments that I get to share with her bring immeasurable joy.
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Name: Graciela Brewer
Child: Emmett (6 years)
Student Status: RC
Where are you from? Domestic: from all over!
Professional pathway pre-HBS: I went to college in the Midwest and I was in undergrad when I had my son. After graduating, I worked in user experience designing software for a Kansas City based healthcare software company. While working there, I became interested in the business side of things, so I decided to apply to b-school and was shocked when I was accepted into HBS!
Summer Internship: Design Operations Lead at Toast in Boston
Little one’s favorites: Elephant and Piggie books are his favorite. Also loves Sonic and board games (especially chess). Favorite movies are Moana and Frozen.
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? Always having the sweetest cuddles as soon as you get home! But also, the ability to prioritize time at home without as much FOMO. It's a lot harder to feel bad about missing some event when you know you're spending much needed quality time with your family.
How do you make it work? Luckily, my husband selflessly takes on a lot so that I can feel involved at HBS. Whether that be doing the dishes while I read cases, or doing bedtime duty so I can make it to a dinner with classmates. His support is so deeply appreciated! More generally though, I think a flexible parenting style helps. For instance, letting my son experience a fun event can sometimes take priority over getting home for regular bedtime.
What advice do you have for others thinking about starting a family? Just to know that it is possible to have a family and a career! So many inspiring women do it every day and it takes work (like anything else), but it is definitely doable.
What has it been like to be a mama + student during COVID? I would actually say I've been super lucky in that COVID has made the student mom role a little easier. Because of how many things can be done remotely currently, I've had the amazing opportunity to spend so much more time at home with my son.
Best memory from RC year? I think a super sweet story is that just recently, two of my male sectionmates took it upon themselves to plan my son a section wide birthday party. It was Moana-themed, complete with cupcakes, a pinata, and outdoor games. Half of my section came and a ton of people brought gifts. Emmett loved it so much and he said at the end of the day that the party was a "dream come true." Having my section celebrate the most important person in my life meant so much to me!
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Name: Ashley Chang
Child: Jonas (almost 6 years) and Clement (2.5 years)
Student Status: EC
Where are you from? Taiwan
Professional pathway pre-HBS: I was a product manager in the semiconductor industry
Post HBS Plan: I am joining a corporate investment office and staying in Boston area
Little one’s favorites: Cars, Cars and Cars. Anything with cars on it.
What has been the best part of being a mom at HBS? I love how my boys are able to hang out with other kids from other HBS families. It is fun to walk down the SFP sesame street (what we call the Harvard University Housing Soldiers Field Park apartments) and find friends to play with. They also have exposure to different cultures and perspectives! The best part is getting two "HBS Kid" caps.
What has been most challenging about being a mama and student during COVID?
It takes a village to raise a child. My husband and I do not have a support system in Boston. With both parents working/studying, we build up childcare help step-by-step to make sure we can run through the day-to-day. When COVID hit, the village disappeared. It is impossible to take care of two energetic boys while taking a class or having a meeting. I am lucky to have a supportive husband. Despite his work, he is willing to step up to entertain the boys during my class time. I am grateful to have him by my side!